Great Truths

• Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, and some days you’re the statue.
• Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
• Drive carefully. It’s not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.
• Eat a live toad in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you for the rest of the day.
• If you can’t be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
• If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
• Never buy a car you can’t push.
• Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.
• The early worm gets eaten by the bird, so sleep late.
• When everything’s coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
• Birthdays are good for you; the more you have, the longer you live.
• Ever notice that the people who are late are often much jollier than the people who have to wait for them?
• If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?
• You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
• Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
• Don’t cry because it’s over; smile because it happened.
• We could learn a lot from crayons: some are sharp, some are pretty, some are dull, some have weird names, and all are different colors; but they all have to learn to live in the same box.
• A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
• Happiness comes through doors you didn’t even know you left open.
• Have an awesome day, and know that someone has thought about you today…